Bruce Springsteen, A Man For All Reasons

Whether it's hitting a camera guy with his balls at the Super Bowl or singing in everyone's favorite new President, Bruce Springsteen is the man who can do anything. Why did they even bother having someone else write a poem for Obama's big day when The Boss would have written something to guarantee that a million people on The Mall would be pumping their fists to every word? 

Can you honestly think of one situation at which El Jefe would not be your number one pick to do the talking? Tonight at the gym I tried to think of such a situation, but could not. Shouldn't he just do anything of national significance from now on? Honestly? Can anyone else ever really play the Super Bowl again and not think of his performance without shitting their pants a little? Please let me know if there is something I'm missing but here is a cross section:

1) Your dog just got hit by a car. Who do you want to tell your kids? There is no goddamn way I am telling the kids, either my wife or The Boss is telling them. 

2) You are married. Who do you want giving the best man speech? WHO DO YOU WANT PLAYING THE JOINT AFTER SAID SPEECH?!

3) You are dead. Who do you want giving the eulogy? Oh yeah you do.

4) You have been dumped, again, by that girl Christy, or Shirley, or something, and the shrew did it in your own car. Who is taking you to the boardwalk in Seaside Heights, NJ to talk to you about it and get you good and drunk? 

5) The Berlin Wall has come down. Who should have been playing while all those Germans went to work with pick axes on the thing? 

6) The nation has been torn asunder, the economy is failing, we are either in a war or about to go to one: picture your favorite Presidential words as said by Springsteen and tell me they don't sound twice as inspiring: 'the only thing we have to fear is fear itself', 'Ask not what your country can do for you ...', you get the picture. 

What I'm trying to say here is that there is no event you can think of at which The Boss would not be the perfect emcee and I defy anyone to think of one.